This is Stella.
Stella will soon be 4-years-old. Stella knows presents come with birthdays so she is waiting--as patiently as any almost 4-year-old can wait--for her big day to arrive. On that special day she is hoping to receive a Dora the Explorer Talking Backpack. 
Over the past several weeks she has come close to obsessing over this particular item, rejecting even the possibility of any and all contenders. On June 17 she is hoping to leap into the position of a Dora the Explorer Talking Backpack owner, a station of probable envy for many little girls.I suspect that Stella, like all of us at one time or another, struggles a bit with the need for recognition. As a middle child, she occupies a position between two accomplished and independent (at least in her eyes) older twin sisters . . .
. . . and one younger "baby" sister who is developing a personality all of her own.
With that kind of competition, its hard to know who you are. Some days Stella wants to use a baby spoon just like Indira. On other days she insists on a booster seat in the mini-van just like the ones her older siblings occupy. Buckled into a "big girl" booster seat in the back of my van recently, Stella exclaimed, "I just wish those girls could see me now riding in the back on one of the big seats."
Already, at a very young age, Stella is thinking about what will help her leap ahead in recognition and significance. And even though she isn't aware of it, she's already influenced by the subtle--and not so subtle--cues from her context (family, playmates and preschool) and culture (media and marketing) about what will cause her to leap ahead of others.
Sleeping, Creeping and Leaping
Over the last three weeks I've been talking a lot about the positive aspects of "sleeping, creeping and leaping" for plants and people, but before we leave this theme, I think its important to note one or two things about leaping -- what it is, what it looks like and how it might be pursued and developed.
People Choose, Plants Don't
When I talk about "leaping" for perennials, I'm referring to the blossoming and flourishing that occurs after the roots are established in fertile soil with adequate light, moisture and care. If this happens, good things naturally occur.
With people, it's different. We have a choice. We can spend many long years planning, hoping, dreaming, working and striving to achieve a perceived level of leaping that may ultimately be less than satisfying. We may laugh at Stella's preoccupation with a Dora the Explorer Talking Backpack, but many of us are often just as silly and immature. We may be just as focused on things likely to bring us limited satisfaction. New things, new experiences, new accomplishments--in and of themselves are not exactly wrong or bad, but they may be short-sighted. We can spend a lot of time and energy on things destined to bring very little joy or long-term leaping.
If our leaping or flourishing is dependent on what we have or what we are able to achieve, we place our future happiness and contentment in the hands of others. In this case, we have little chance of achieving what Dallas Willard described as "a pervasive and constant sense of well-being." If we want to spend more of our days "leaping," we will want to choose the focus of our activities wisely.
Leap Where You Live
You've probably heard the expression, "Bloom where you're planted."
I'd like to suggest we amend that saying to, "leap where you live." I've been privileged to know people with difficult circumstances who not only "bloomed," but "leapt" with joy and enthusiasm. Their day-to-day lives were marked with courage, conviction and contentment. They weren't often successful in the world's eyes. They didn't necessarily achieve great things. Their stories didn't make the evening news. They were just the kind of people you wanted to be around because of who they were and how they made you feel when you were with them. I want to be that kind of person, but it's not easy.
I'll admit it. Most of my life I've been achievement driven. I like setting goals and achieving them. I like to make lists and accomplish them. I like to be successful at the ambitions I have for myself. When I can't do these things, for one reason or another, I'm typically frustrated and irritable, (Translation--Not that much fun to be around.) Lately, I've been giving a lot of thought to how some of the items I have on my list might be for me a lot like the Dora the Explorer Talking Backpack is for Stella--just a passing objective on the way to something more. If I am to learn to "leap where I live," then it may be good to reconsider the focus and direction of that leaping.
Thoughtfully yours,
Dr. Jennifer Baker
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